Three Leadership Tips Guaranteed To Solve Your Practice Management Woes
Veterinary medicine has an acute problem. Simply put, there is too much work, for too few people - and those people are all pretty close to breaking.
There are many ways to solve this problem of course. For example, we could train more vets and technicians. Or we could listen to the work-life balance clamour and schedule more effectively. But of course these things either take time or cost more than many seem willing to pay. Therefore, in the interests of innovation and change, we’ve come up with a novel set of solutions that seem like bullet-proof ways of changing things up for the better. Read on to learn more. But be warned, you’re likely to face palm at how you could have possibly missed these ideas, such is their beautiful simplicity.
You Are Taking The Piss
We all know that we are time crunched, but what you might not know is that the average human needs to urinate about 6 times each day. We estimate the average check out time from answering the call of nature to be around four to five minutes. That means everyday we might save a full 30 minutes of time if these somehow could be eliminated. The solution? To fit each employee with a urinary catheter! Bingo - no downtime required, aside from a super quick F1-style bag change at the end of the shift. (After you've clicked off - obvs).
Liquid Fuel
Caloric intake is another huge problem for vets and nurses who regularly complain of not getting either enough, or good enough quality nutrition during busy work shifts. Instead, sustaining themselves on chocolates donated from some of the less grouchy clients. This is a huge issue as low blood sugar results in impaired judgement and clinical errors. Not to mention the hangry rage attacks that deplete cultural cohesion. But there is clearly a bigger issue at stake - the lost hours/insanity of staff actually getting a break each day! The number of work hours lost to this issue alone is outrageously high. Yet the solution is, once again, staring us right in the face. The placement of an indwelling pharyngostomy tube! Once inserted, nutrition can easily be administered in just seconds directly into the stomach saving goodness knows how many work hours across the team each week. Winner!
Energiser Bunnies
All of this is great, but we all know that humans need rest, plus we suffer from peaks and troughs of energy each day. But what if this could be abolished? Imagine the human who could work 24 hours a day with no sleep? Imagine the productivity benefits! You could literally cut your head count in half and not worry about having to hire more vets and nurses! Well, imagine no more. Simply hook up an amphetamine infusion to your team and away you go! No sleep ’til bedtime. Or ever.
So there you have it. Three sure fire ways to eliminate waste (no pun intended), annoying staff breaks and massively increase the productivity of your practice.
What’s not to like?
OK, so right now you’re probably feeling pretty dumb for not dreaming up these ideas yourself. But hopefully we’ve gotten your grey matter fired up and you have some ideas of your own? If so, we’d love to hear them - leave your comments below.
And, you’re welcome.
Note - please do not follow any of this advice… the drugs don't work kids and humans really, really need breaks, good nutrition/hydration and sleep. ;-)
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